Let Your Sorrows Sleep
by Tupti
Summary: After Jace has vanished, Alec overexerts himself in his search for him. Magnus is worried. Malec, fluffly/angsty ficlet.
"You need to sleep!"

Alec sighs as he buries his face in his hands. He has been sitting at the big desk in his room for days, studying one book after another in search for anything that might help track Jace or Valentine or the cup. „I can't, Magnus", he groans.

Carefully the warlock rests a hand on Alec's shoulder.

"You won't help Jace by staring at the same books over and over again. You can barely hold yourself up, let alone think straight. You need to rest!", the warlock stresses again, a bit more forcefully this time. But Alec shakes his head.

"You don't understand", he mumbles. "It's not that I won't – I literally can't. It's like my thoughts are constantly screaming at me. They keep going round in circles, keeping me awake." He presses the heels of his hands against his eyes. "And even if I could fall asleep, they would probably follow me into my dreams..." He sighs again.

Magnus's heart sinks. It hurts him to see Alec so helpless and desperate and not being able to help. He leans against the desk, so he's almost at eye level with Alec.

"What kind of thoughts are they?", he asks gently.

Alec shrugs his shoulders, more in a gesture of surrender than of confusion. "Of Jace, obviously. I mean, we have no clue what Valentine might be doing to him, where he might have taken him, how he might be suffering. I keep imagining the most terrible things until I actually believe they're real, I …" He sighs again. "I'm going crazy, Magnus."

His eyes make contact with the warlock's and for the first time since he's known him, Magnus can see fear in them, just naked, fear. He wants to hug Alec, wants to hold him, but he doesn't dare to. So much happened since the wedding, since their kiss, and the status of their relationship has gotten even more confusing. As long as Magnus isn't sure how much intimacy Alec is willing to allow, he will not force him.

"Maybe I can help", he offers carefully. "I can take away those thoughts for a few hours, I can take away your dreams."

Alec furrows his brow. "You can?"

Magnus nods. "Only if you want me to!", he stresses. "Just for a few hours." He is pleading now. "Please, let me do this for you, Alexander!"

He can see the inner struggle Alec has to overcome.

"You are no use to anyone in this state", he tries a different approach. "You can barely function!" This finally seems to convince the shadowhunter and it breaks Magnus's heart. _He's only ever thinking of himself as an asset to everybody else, never as a person who deserves anything in his own right. But that's a battle for another day._

Alec struggles to get out of his chair, that's how exhausted he his. Magnus needs to help him over to his bed, where Alec falls into the cushions with his eyes already closed. With fumbling hands he drags the covers over his body as if they were as heavy as stone., while the warlock sits down on the edge of the mattress. He rubs his hand together until blue sparks begin to fly, then he very gently rests them on Alec's hair. The shadowhunter bats his dark lashes open to look at him.

"Are you just going to sit there?", he asks drowsily.

The blue sparks fade as the warlock stops the flow of magic through his fingers. "I will need to actively keep the spell going", he explains. "As soon as I lose contact, your thoughts and dreams will return."

"So you want to sit there all night?"

Magnus shrugs. "I don't mind", he replies. "When you have lived for a couple of hundred years, a couple of hours aren't a long time to be alone with your thoughts."

The hint of a smile tugs at Alec's lips, then he raises the covers, this time as if they were as light as a feather.

"Lie down with me", he whispers.

A jolt of excitement races through Magnus's body as he hears those words. His whole being yearns for Alec's touch, his warmth, his smell. It takes tremendous effort to keep himself from sliding under the blanket immediately.

"Are you sure?", he asks, because if there is one thing he doesn't want, it's rushing Alec into anything. But the shadowhunter nods and smiles and keeps the covers lifted.

As calmly as he can manage Magnus slips off his shoes and his jacket and slides underneath the blanket and into Alec's arms that pull him in close. He can smell him, a mixture of worn off cologne and sweat. His skin is warm and soft, his thick dark hair tickles his nose. Magnus can't help it, as a content sigh escapes from his lips. He can't remember the last time he felt so secure, so at home, if he ever did at all. He looks up into Alec's face and can see that he has his eyes closed again, but he's smiling, his face seems relaxed for the first time in what feels like ages. With a soft gesture Magnus gets his magic flowing again. He gently threads his sparkling fingers through Alec's hair as he takes all the thoughts and worries and fears away from him, leaving nothing for his mind to keep working at. It takes mere seconds for Alec to fall asleep, holding on to Magnus as if he would never let him go again.


End file.
